And I Should Celebrate You Because?

Do birthday cards get meaner as we get older or do we get meaner because we get older?

It’s a strange phenomenon.

I got a card last week that said: “I’ve decided to do something special for your birthday, but it doesn’t include you.”

That’s not funny.

It made me want a pity party, not a birthday party.

So When Does It Turn?

When does it go from “Happy Fourth Birthday, Superstar” to “Happy You’re Still Around Period?”

However ill-placed, it makes me think there’s a market for some transitional teenage greeting cards that read: “Happy Birthday, Snot-Nose” and “Remember when you used to listen to Mom and Dad? We don’t either; Good Luck and Happy Birthday.”

But I don’t have the heart.

Kids don’t need that kind of help transitioning into the realities of adulthood.

Climbing the proverbial hill is hard enough, but being told that you’re over it?

Is actually not so bad.

It might even be better on this side.

Maybe

Mean birthday cards are part of human nature, part of our build-’em-up-tear-’em-down culture.

Making fun of and criticizing others can make us feel better about who we think we are.

It keeps us in denial and distracts us from doing the work we need to do individually, to make ourselves better.

But maybe mean birthday cards are just a funny way to deal better with our own mortality, a reminder not to take life too seriously and to laugh at ourselves a little bit more than we do.

At least once a year.

Either way, I’m just grateful to be remembered.

So here’s to another birthday.

To still being able to cartwheel my way across the backyard and to still being able to beat my brother in a headstand race.

Here’s to stepping outside the reality of time and remembering who we wished to be when birthdays couldn’t come fast enough and they never lasted long enough.

We may grow old to the world outside of ourselves, but we will always be young at heart to those whose hearts we know and that is the best-wished-birthday-wish, we can ever hope to have.

Cheers…

…To living outside the touch of time and remembering each other for who we’ve always been.

Brother-Sister-Friends.

Until next week,

Happy Birthday, ya ol’ Fart.

 

 

 

 

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17 Responses to “And I Should Celebrate You Because?”

  1. AndrewFebruary 10, 2017 at 4:14 pm #

    Who you calling old fart..and I think Dan will have to have a headstand competition this summer..happy birthday to you, you are the sunshine in my days..

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:46 pm #

      Thanks, Andy! xoxo :=)

  2. MhawksFebruary 10, 2017 at 4:28 pm #

    Sometimes it’s an inside joke…like a layered cake, only layers of laughs. Hope you had a wonderful birthday!!????????

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:46 pm #

      How true! Love the layered cake analogy! 🙂 xoxo

  3. SueFebruary 10, 2017 at 4:57 pm #

    I think we get meaner as we get older! Ugh love the article!

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:45 pm #

      I’m with you! Ugh! LOLOL Thanks, Sue! xo

  4. GTFebruary 10, 2017 at 7:45 pm #

    …To living outside the touch of time and remembering each other for who we’ve always been.

    Exquisite!

    GT

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:44 pm #

      Thanks, GT. 🙂 xoxo

  5. Bud VearFebruary 11, 2017 at 8:00 am #

    I do enjoy your blogs. My birthday wishes now congratulate me for living so long, and I wonder how the number got so big. As long as I think birthdays are better than the alternative, I can still enjoy life. Thanks for including me on your list. Your messages are always poignant. Bud.

  6. Bud VearFebruary 11, 2017 at 8:00 am #

    I do enjoy your blogs. My birthday wishes now congratulate me for living so long, and I wonder how the number got so big. As long as I think birthdays are better than the alternative, I can still enjoy life. Thanks for including me on your list. Your messages are always poignant. Bud.

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:43 pm #

      Thanks, Bud. That means a lot coming from you. You are a great and life-affirming example of how to live every day to the fullest, and with joy! Thank you for that! xo

  7. ScottFebruary 11, 2017 at 10:33 am #

    First of all, please allow me to say “Happy Birthday!” Great article, as always. It made me wonder if somehow our penchant for mean birthday salutations are more about our collective inability to be vulnerable and share with others what we really think of them. For many, it’s hard to tell people how much we appreciate and love them!

    • MO VEARFebruary 12, 2017 at 2:38 pm #

      Thanks and thanks, Scott! 🙂

      You are so right! I feel like that’s part of human nature too – our collective inability to be vulnerable, but why? I guess because making ourselves vulnerable is shrouded in shame? It makes us appear weak? I feel like it’s just the opposite – at least that’s been my experience. I know many people mistake it for weakness at times, but I feel stronger because of it.

      I just talked to the boys again this morning about being honest about how they feel, instead of being sarcastic! I banished sarcasm years ago, but I’m starting to hear it more often than I want.

      Anyway, thanks as always, for reading and commenting. Always appreciate YOU and your insights. xo 😉

  8. JerryFebruary 13, 2017 at 8:15 am #

    How many times have I chosen a greeting card that I thought was screamingly funny only to get it home and decide it was so disrespectful that there was no one I hate enough to send it to. I have found it difficult to find genuinely funny birthday cards for the so-called over the hill recipient. Even to someone like me who treasures true wit, there is a fine line between a sardonic reminder of encroaching mortality and an ageist taunt. But I like your attitude. If it reminds me that someone is thinking of me, then why should I complain. I am grateful to still be around and in reasonably good health. And, like me, even the best of friends can lapse into poor taste in greeting cards.

    • MO VEARFebruary 13, 2017 at 6:57 pm #

      HA! This is great and so true!!!! Thanks for commenting, Jerry! 🙂

  9. GayFebruary 14, 2017 at 8:47 am #

    Happy Belated Birthday! Didn’t realize it was on Ground Hogs day!! You probably get blamed a lot for our late springs?!! Ha! I won’t send you a mean card! I go for the “laugh out-loud funny” type! If that happens when I’m buying a card I know it’ll do the same for the recipient! One of the perks of getting older is having more opportunity to find the humor in the moments and those moments help make life unforgettable!! Thanks for this moment!

    • MO VEARFebruary 14, 2017 at 12:24 pm #

      Awww, thanks, Gay!!!! ya ol’ fart!

      I DO get blamed for late spring – a lot! 🙂 I’m with you – the older I get, the more humor I have; so much better than the alternative!!!! LOL

      As always, so great to hear from you! xo

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